#25 Belonging + Sports

Aug 8

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In this episode, Dr. Mona chats with Phil Ford, a megastar basketball legend who played in college for the University of North Carolina and in the NBA for numerous teams. He then became a basketball coach for 12 years and spent 7 of those coaching in the NBA.

Phil grew up in Rocky Mount, North Carolina and his mom’s brothers were athletes and encouraged Phil to play sports. Both of his parents valued education and he had a happy balance between school and sports. Childhood sports taught Phil that the guys on your team are family and you have a special bond between people on teams because you depend on each other. Phil also says you succeed and fail together on a team which is crucial as well. Phil’s Dad was a sharecropper’s son and got a masters degree in the 50’s as a Black man. Phil really admired his Dad. His Dad couldn’t play athletics because he worked on the farm every day, but he allowed Phil to play and go to games. Phil’s Dad was at all his sporting events and let Phil go with him when he attended the high school sports as the activity bus driver.

Next, Phil shares how he played under the legendary Coach Dean Smith and how he was recruited by him to play for UNC. Phil had 300 letters from schools and narrowed it down to the top 8. He was one of the top ten players in high school in the US. Coach Smith was the last one to visit his home and he told him that he wasn’t sure where he’d fit in, and that he’d have to play junior varsity. Every other coach promised him playing time, but Coach Smith did the opposite. His Mom loved Coach Smith because she said they could trust him. Even though Phil was a top 10 player in high school, they didn’t know what kind of college player he’d be. Coach Smith was fair in not promising anyone playing time or a starting position, but making them earn it. Phil was the first freshman to start for him because Ray Harrison was in school and took a medical leave during Phil’s freshman year. Deciding to play for Coach Smith was one of the best decisions he ever made. Practice at UNC was tough with timed drills and expectations to hustle and sprint everywhere. Coach Smith was mild-mannered at games, but not at practice. He didn’t want to embarrass any players in public and even made visitors sit up in the upper bowl when they visited to not embarrass players in practice. Coach Smith really cared for them not just as basketball players, but as people. He stayed in contact with the players and their families even after they left his team. Coach Smith taught Phil about respect and loyalty in terms of sportsmanship, and he always had their back and put out his face for them publicly.

Shifting gears, Phil discusses the NBA and how that experience was different from playing college basketball. Phil was the second pick in the first round of the NBA draft. He says that UNC played a very pro-style game by averaging 80 points a game and playing man-to-man defense. His NBA coach hadn’t asked him to do anything different than Coach Smith asked him to do. The biggest difference was playing against someone great every night, so you had to mentally prepare. In college, you play 30-35 games but in the NBA, you play 80 regular season games with more traveling. There were no private planes, so they had to take the first flight out in case there were cancellations. He formed special relationships with the guys on his team because of the amount of time they spent together traveling, practicing, hanging out in hotels, and eating together. Celebrity players and bigger salaries have changed in the last 12 years or so, and that does change the dynamics of a team. Phil says it is harder to coach now because you don’t know who will be on your team. NIL or Name, Image and Likeness deals are now the norm and Phil is happy players are getting paid, but hoping it is done right. Phil never disrespected his players and believes that on any level, if a player thinks you can make them better then they will listen. Culture can be taught, but chemistry has to develop itself. Phil’s culture for his teams was to play hard, play smart, play together and have fun. For chemistry, the players have to nurture those relationships and spend that time together.

In closing, Phils shares how his struggle with alcoholism impacted his life and relationships. Phil says it showed him how blessed he was in his life to have the support that he received through my struggles. He became a Christian and now he is as happy as he has ever been. He says his relationships are better now because he is a better person. He didn’t get through those struggles on his own and couldn’t have gotten through it without his support system including his family, teammates, Coach Smith and coworkers. Lastly, Phil says that belonging to him means always having people you can count on and that you can depend on each other. Belonging means you share good and bad times together and can be yourself with one another. Belonging is one of the biggest blessings in life.

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0:39 - Dr. Mona introduces today’s guest, Phil Ford.

5:14 - How did basketball come into the picture for you?

9:30 - How did the relationship with your Dad shape the person you are now and as an athlete?

11:38 - How did Coach Dean Smith recruit you?

16:17 - How was it playing under Coach Smith’s leadership?

21:02 - How different was it playing in the NBA?

24:57 - How have celebrity players shifted in sports?

28:09 - How did your past experiences impact your leadership style?

33:34 - How did your struggle with alcohol impact your life and relationships at the time?

36:31 - What does belonging mean to Phil?

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