#1 Introducing Belonging Reimagined
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In this episode, Dr. Mona introduces the podcast, Belonging Reimagined, and shares her family background, how she ended up in the mental health world, and what she hopes for her listeners.
First, Dr. Mona shares her family background and how she has always been obsessed with the human experience. Her parents emigrated from Egypt with $50 and ended up in the cold Northeastern U.S. Her Dad was a urologist and her Mom was looking at urologist journals to search for a warmer place to live. She saw a town name that caught her eye in the journal. As they were driving down the coast to Florida, they saw the same town name and so they took the exit. Her parents found the nearest hospital and asked about an open position for a urologist. The hospital confirmed that they still needed one, and that’s how they ended up in the rural U.S. South!
Even though there were literal and figurative signs that led them there, they didn’t see the other signs until after they moved. The town had billboards promoting the KKK, and as a girl with brown skin, curly hair and big green eyes, Dr. Mona uncomfortably stood out. People constantly asked her the loaded question, “What are you?” that so many ethnically ambiguous people hear. This led her to reclaim that question. Instead of asking “What am I?,” she started asking “Who am I?” This became a lifelong journey for her, as she sought connection in the world. She noticed that some people felt an ease moving through life, while others struggled, regardless of their ethnicities.
Next, Dr. Mona talks about how she felt most connected in theater, where she made various observations. First, playing a different character ironically freed her to be herself. She could use her own interpretation when on stage. Secondly, she started making interpersonal relationships and developed close friendships. Next, she experienced a sense of community in theater like they had a common goal of creating a production. They were doing something together on stage and everyone had each other’s backs if someone missed their lines or needed help with a scene. She never felt this before and had unconditional, deep respect, fun, shared values and passion with the other kids in the theater. Lastly, she felt the cast was engaged in something bigger than themselves by working to move an audience, which seemed bigger than the cast community. This experience informed her of the four types of connection: connection with our own selves, interpersonal connection (one-on-one), connection in community, and finally connection to something bigger, which can be spiritual or macro, like your connection to this world or to your country.
Growing up in Egyptian culture, success was defined by career, specifically by becoming a doctor or engineer, but she ended up in financial services and disliked it vehemently. She later ended up in the mental health world, became a therapist and started counseling. She kept hearing stories from people describing situations that felt so similar to the ones she had growing up. She says you can tell a lot about a person’s feelings about belonging by asking about their childhood experiences in the cafeteria and at sleepovers. She started research on bicultural identity integration, and found that identity is impacted by the level to which we feel we belong in four areas of life, the same four areas she noticed as a theater kid. The degree to which we feel seen, embraced, and celebrated by ourselves, in interpersonal relationships, in community and in something bigger deepens our sense of belonging.
Throughout this podcast, Dr. Mona is hoping you get to hear how these four types of belonging impact human experiences. The one thing we have in common is that we’re trying to do this life thing. In this podcast, you will hear from many amazing guests talking about these experiences, their belonging gaps, and how that has shaped their identity. Dr. Mona and guests will explore the topics of belonging black, queer, workplace trauma, interracial relationships, politics, setting boundaries with folks and more! She is looking forward to sharing these stories with you every Thursday!
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0:09 - Dr. Mona introduces the podcast and shares her family background.
1:48 - The negative aspects of growing up in a small town with brown skin.
3:20 - Her feeling of belonging in theater and the four types of connection.
6:23 - Dr. Mona explains how she ended up in the mental health world and her research.
8:04 - What she hopes for all of her listeners.
9:40 - Example of how belonging gaps can impact our identity.
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